I reread most of the Christmas passages this week and was intrigued by some ideas in Mary’s magnificent song, her response when she saw Elizabeth for the first time after they both had seen angels and both were miraculously pregnant:

And Mary said:
“My soul glorifies the Lord
and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,
for he has been mindful
of the humble state of his servant.
From now on all generations will call me blessed,
for the Mighty One has done great things for me—
holy is his name.
His mercy extends to those who fear him,
from generation to generation.
He has performed mighty deeds with his arm;
he has scattered those who are proud in their inmost thoughts.
He has brought down rulers from their thrones
but has lifted up the humble.
He has filled the hungry with good things
but has sent the rich away empty.
He has helped his servant Israel,
remembering to be merciful
to Abraham and his descendants forever,
just as he promised our ancestors.” Luke 1:46-55 NI

I see 3 thoughts that give comfort to us when we’re hurting.

1. God was “mindful” of Mary’s situation. I believe He is also mindful of yours. He is not up there somewhere looking off dreamily into the universe. He knows what is going on in your life and in your heart. He is mindful of the pain and sorrow of your grief. You are not alone wherever you are on your grief journey now.
2. He has scattered the proud (ie, those who thought they had their lives together, but now they have had to come to the end of themselves, like the rest of us); brought rulers down and lifted up the humble; filled the hungry and emptied the rich. In His coming kingdom, everything is upside down and inside out. So your pain, sorrow and grief will also be turned to joy and understanding and peace. I’m looking forward to those days when there is no more pain or grief! *
3. In the last line, these words appear: “as He promised.” Here is comfort too. He promised that He will be with us and not forsake us. So right now, you are not forsaken no matter how you might feel otherwise. He promised that He will make all things new. So your life will be remade by God’s grace into something full and rich and good.

God has promised that He is with us all the time everywhere. Not looking over our shoulders and judging, but being there so we have someone to lean on when things get tough. He says He will redeem our sorrows and make them into something good so we can rejoice. He keeps His promises. So we can rejoice through this season.

Read the Christmas Scriptures and look for little nuggets that give you hope in your present circumstances. They are there. Blessings in your reading.
*Revelation 21:4

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Giving Thanks to God for blessings of each day, each week, our life-times is God’s command to us – be thankful.

Give thanks no matter what happens. God wants you to thank Him because you believe in Christ Jesus. I Thessalonians 5:18 (NIRV)

Let the peace that Christ gives rule in your hearts. As parts of one body, you were appointed to live in peace. And be thankful. Let Christ’s word live in you like a rich treasure. Teach and correct each other wisely. Sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing with thanks in your hearts to God. Do everything you say or do in the name of the Lord Jesus. Always give thanks to God the Father through Christ. Colossians 3:15-17 (NIRV)

I will extol You, O LORD, for You have lifted me up,
You have turned for me my mourning into dancing;
You have loosed my sackcloth and girded me with gladness,
That my soul may sing praise to You and not be silent.
O LORD my God, I will give thanks to You forever. Psalm 30:1, 11-12

Sing and worship the Lord with joy;
For He made us and we are His people.
So come and give Him thanks for He is good, all the time. Psalm 100 (Judy’s condensed version)

(Try also the following passages of thanks: I Chronicles 16:8-9; Ps 7:17; Psalm 28:6-7; Psalm 107:1)

I have mentioned in an earlier blog that each of us has things for which to be thankful because of the life of the one whose death we are now grieving. Perhaps they made you laugh in a certain way. They made you see something in the world that without their insight you would have ignored. They were avid fans of some sport that you didn’t know was exciting until they showed you the joy of it. They were in music and until their interest you had no interest. And so on. You learned obedience as you taught your children, or patience, or perseverance, or some other character trait. Now that you have learned that trait, you honor the memory of that child every time you employ that strength. So give thanks for them and for those lessons.

Thanksgiving does something for and in you. It is connected to Peace. Look at Philippians 4:6-7. As you converse with your Father in Heaven (prayer), with a thankful heart, present your requests about anything and everything. Then Anxiety melts away and Peace grows in its place. Peace with God. Peace among men and Peace within yourself. All this peace grows because you are seeing the situation and the world from God’s perspective because you have come close to Him as you pray. Giving God thanks is His prescription to help in healing your grief. Have a good thanks-giving this weekend.

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What is His will? That we know Him.

I know that knowing God better is not a good trade for the life of your child. Yet, it is the goal God has had from the beginning of time for you and for your child. It’s His agenda for us all.

“Thy will be done.” Jesus prayed it and so do we. In the Garden, before His crucifixion, Jesus begged God to revise His plan for history. Jesus urgently and passionately wrestled in prayer, sweating hard, that “this cup pass from me.” But the sweating and wrestling stopped and peace came over Him when He concluded He would yield to the Father’s will – “Thy will be done.” You can sense that peace in His determination and focus on the goal, in His humility throughout the pseudo-trial and mocking, because as far as He was concerned, the issue was settled. Thy will be done, period, end of story.

We pray it in the prayer Jesus taught us through His disciples. “Our Father… Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven” (Matthew 6:9-10). In heaven it is done always, immediately and completely. Thinking about myself, I fall far short of doing His will so thoroughly. (Thankfully, His grace covers my sin even more thoroughly!)

What is His will that we are praying for? His will is that we know Him. His will is that we walk with Him, experience His mercy, grow to be more like Him and reflect His character.

“…have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;” Philippians 2:5-6

“He… predestined [us] to be conformed to the likeness of His Son.” Romans 8:29 That’s the end result God has planned for us.

Job became more like Him when he saw and understood more deeply because of his losses and grief. Job questioned deeply God’s plans, and then yielded to His will.

Surely I spoke of things I did not understand,
things too wonderful for me to know.
“You said, ‘Listen now, and I will speak;
I will question you, and you shall answer me.’
My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you.” Job 42:3-5

Your child died. It must have been God’s will since it happened. Your child has completed that goal already because she/he has seen Him and knows Him. But now, can you yield, and become more like Him through this valley of the shadow of death? This IS God’s will for you now. Allow Him to use this horrible event, your child’s death, to work in you so that you are more conformed to His likeness.

“Thy will be done.”

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The death of your child was no surprise to God. At the time of your child’s death, Jesus had the power to revive the child. But He didn’t. Why? Because calling him back to life would have been a demotion!
For all those who have taken Jesus into their hearts, after death there is the real life we have all been created for. Can you imagine living in the best Disney World for the rest of forever? That’s sort of what it’s like now in heaven with Jesus. It is beautiful. It is peaceful. There are no fights, criminals, or evil. There is no pain, sickness or hospitals. There is no lying, so everyone is who they seem to be. The Bible says “absent from the body, present with the Lord” (Revelation 21:4, Philippians 1:21-24, II Corinthians 5:8).

But if you insisted that he come back here to this world – the fallen world where the nightly news is filled with wars and rumors of war, starvation, political upheaval, murder, accidents and man’s inhumanity to man – would the child rejoice to be out of that world and back in this one? Considering how great is the world to come and how broken the world right here is, I’d guess he would NOT prefer this one. Calling him from heaven to earth is really coming from Life to death. To bring your child back to you, is not better for him than being there with Jesus in the home He has prepared specifically for your child.

Parents have said they are not sad for where the child is now. They are sad for where the child is not – he is not here where the parents can see and touch him. Certainly, that absence is a huge source of the sorrow that is grief. But all the moms and dads who also have Christ in their lives will go to where the child is when it’s their time. The child knows this and is content waiting till you come to him.

So Jesus has power over life and death, and decided to let the child stay in the heavenly world that you’ll go to later too. Heaven is the presence of Christ. Heaven is also the company of His people, so it is a great reunion for us with the ones we loved but from whom we have been temporarily separated. Let us press on toward that reunion. Your grief and separation now are a temporary circumstance on your way to eternity.

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